- April 26, 2024
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Neil and Ruth Van De Weert stand in front of an orange tree in full blossom in their backyard. Photo by Jacque Estes
Neil Van De Weert adjusts the coquina water mill in the backyard. The idea for the mill came to him one evening after he had gone to bed. Photo by Jacque Estes
The Van De Weert's farm roots are evident from the repurposed work boots by the front door to the gardens in the backyard. Photo Jacque Estes
Neil and Ruth Van De Weert look at a saw from the farm that was transformed into a piece of art by a friend. The saw is painted on both sides and depicts the four seasons. A painting of their farm is on the wall. Photo by Jacque Estes.
Ruth Van De Weert shows the other side of the painted saw. Photo by Jacque Estes
Neil Van De Weert has a story he likes to tell about how he and his wife Ruth ended up marrying 70 years ago.
“I worked for her father for a couple of years out of high school and he said to me, 'do you like your job?' I said yes, I wanted to be a farmer,” Neil said. “He said to me, 'I've got three daughters. The oldest one is married, the second one is in nurses training in New York City, and Ruth is home.' I said, 'no problem, I'll take her,' and we've been together ever since.”
“He has to tell this story to everybody he sees,” Ruth Van De Weert said.
“I think that's part of their secret. They never stop.” JOAN ADRIANCE daughter.
“There's a lot of truth in that story,” her husband responds.
The humor and whimsey of the couple is not only in their banter, it's evident throughout their home. The landscaping includes a stone light house with a water mill that Neil built by the driveway. A wishing well is on the other side of the yard. Milk cans from their dairy farm and even an old pair of Neil's work boots, filled with flowers, all bring smiles before the doorbell can be rung.
Ruth was born Feb. 24, 1926, and lived most of her life in Chester, New York. Neil was born in Midland Park, New Jersey on March 9, 1926, making Ruth older, another joke between the two.
Neil's family decided to move to New York to farm when he was 13. The farm they bought was two farms away from Ruth's family farm. The two met on the school bus and became close. On Aug. 6, 1946 they were married.
“We had a lovely wedding at the house,” Ruth said.
“We didn't have any money so our first night we went to a hotel in Newburgh, New York,” Neil said. “A couple we were friends with had a farm and we bunked there for four or five days.”
It wasn't the typical honeymoon as Neil helped with the hay and Ruth picked string beans.
The couple eventually bought Ruth's father's dairy farm.
“When I went to work with her daddy he was milking about 12 cows. When I was finished I was milking about 60-65 cows,” Neil said.
Their family began to grow.
“We found out we couldn't have children so we started out with foster children,” Ruth said.
The couple adopted one boy and three girls. The second baby, adopted when she was eight-weeks old, was diagnosed with a brain tumor and died a little after her first birthday.
“Then we took on another child,” Ruth said.
“That would be me,” Joan Adriance, a daughter who was visiting, laughed.
In their late 60s the couple built some greenhouses on the farm and started growing flower and vegetable plants to sell at the farmer's market in New York City.
The Van De Weerts are still close to their farm roots. An aerial shot of the dairy farm is framed on one wall in their home, and a painting of their farm is on another wall.
Ruth still farms the land – the land in their back yard – onions, potatoes, chard, blueberries, tomatoes, oranges are already growing.
“I think that's part of their secret. They never stop,” Adriance said. “They just love it. She's up at 3 in the morning and by 8 she's outside and she's outside all day long. Dad still plays golf.”
The couple purchased their first lot in Palm Coast in 1975.
"They (ITT) had dinner meetings up in New York, where the money was, to sell lots,” Neil said.
“We went to five meals,” Ruth recalled. “We never used to go out to eat, not even for hamburgers. We bought our lot through a meeting.”
In 1987 the couple built their home and rented it out for six months at a time to people waiting for their houses to be completed. The Van De Weerts only used the house a couple of weeks a year for vacation.
But their visits started to become longer and in 2014 the couple decided to sell their farm and move down full time.
“They were going to take a couple weeks off, take a carload of stuff down to Florida and plant the garden,” Adriance said. “A couple of days before they were going to come home he had a brain bleed and they stayed here permanently.”
They host groups from church at Christmas time – people who don't have family in the area and no place to go. Even when they were only in Palm Coast for a few weeks, the couple would make sure no one was alone on holidays.
“At Easter they would have 25 maybe 30 people here. She would say to me, she was in her 80s then, 'we're having all the elderly here for Easter, they don't have anywhere to go,'” Adriance said. “I told her, 'Well you're elderly and you don't have anywhere to go.' She told me 'we are not elderly.'”
In Palm Coast the couple has remained active in the Gideon Society, Ruth in the Red Hat Society, and at Grace Presbyterian Church.
“I try to have fresh cut flowers in the church every Sunday,” Ruth said. “We are very, very comfortable here.”
So what's the secret to a happy 70-year marriage?
“Thinking of each other and having faith in the Lord,” Ruth said.
