- April 18, 2024
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Bodil Haheim grew up in a household of hatred in Norway, where her father beat her down physically, mentally and emotionally until she mustered up the courage to escape to the United States in 2013.
She moved to Nashville to pursue her dream of singing and songwriting, but the dark passengers of her childhood stayed with her. She turned to drug abuse to cope with the depression, panic attacks and post-traumatic stress that her past physical and emotional abuse had led to. Writing poetry and songs was an emotional outlet for Haheim, and, while living in a Nashville homeless shelter, she made the decision to start writing her life story.
“It always came back, and I just needed to get it out of my head,” Haheim said.
Haheim travelled to Detroit, where she spent the next seven months living in a motel, volunteering at a church and writing her story, which eventually became a self-published book, “Better Believe: A Story of Hope,” under the pen name Ruby Lee Tuesday.
“There’s a lot of tragedy and darkness in my past, and I wanted to put it somewhere,” she said. “It’s hard to acknowledge a lot of the things that happened to me. But when you write, it’s very therapeutic — to get rid of something bad, you have to deal with it.”
In dealing with and overcoming her past, Haheim wanted to bring hope to those in similar situations.
“If one person can come through it, then there’s a lot of hope for a lot of people with problems in their lives,” she said, while sitting in a booth at the BeachHouse Beanery in Flagler Beach. “For me, it was necessary. When you keep things in your mind and don’t talk about it, it becomes a major problem. But when you put it out there, and deal with it — it’s a big part of the healing — to get rid of the guilt and the shame. It can inspire someone to tell their story too.”
After completing her book, Haheim moved back to Nashville and was proud to hold her finished book in her hand, a tangible example of her triumph. That’s when her father appeared again. He had traveled to Nashville to find her. She filed a restraining order against him, and the judge agreed. It was the first time she spoke out against him, her biggest victory and the last thing that happened in her relationship with him.
Her father died a month later, and, after an inheritance battle, Haheim was granted his house in Flagler Beach.
“Yes, it’s ironic, but it’s a big victory,” she said. “When I think about it, I’m just happy, almost speechless.”
Haheim moved to Flagler Beach in October and is using her life by the ocean to restart her life. She hopes to use her music, poetry and book to talk to youth about choices and consequences in life. Through her life experiences, Haheim said one of the more important things she learned is to always believe in your dreams, always do what is right and never lose hope.
“As long as you’re breathing, there is always hope,” she said. “There’s always an opportunity to grow and learn things. And to be here, in Flagler Beach, and in this community, to recoup and be around nice people, it’s just a gift. I’m very grateful to be here.”
